I have a lot of dreams about my college. My life after high school. I promised to change everything. I planned and imagined a lot. I thought i can do everything that i planned and i can be a person that i want to be. But i dont know i already failed or not. I just feel that i a little bit fail because i think this beginning of college life isn’t same like i imagined or maybe totally different. And because of that i start to worry about my dreams. About my promises. Im just not sure that i can do it. I know maybe it’s too fast to give up or something like that but.. But my first score about accounting and my contribution in my “family” there just lead me to think that i can’t. Even not bad at all, i still have the “good beginning”, i have close friends that so kind to me, i have some activities that make me happy. But i just never thought that i will feel soooo uncomfortable like this at there. It will different if i can comfort or feel like youre really a “family”. God i just still want to reach my dreams, my promises, my resolution about college’s life, can i?
I dont even knew you. I stood up and heard your name. Just it. And then, people knew much about you. I asked them. They laughed at me because i didn’t know you. And now, i know you. You know me. Even as simple as that. But still, i cant call your name or even just smiling. Sorry… Sorry for this stupid act. This stupid feeling. This stupid thought. I just can keep all this stupid things. Until you know it someday, until your pic isnt with her anymore, until i can handle all of this stupiid thingy, until i can tell you that im looking at you tonight, with your jacket, your guitar, and your cute eyes as usual. Until you know that actually i really want to call your name and talk with you. Anddd bye bye dont know what to talk again!
Everyone’s with their partner now, and i’m still standing bravely with my ownself.